Friday, December 1, 2017
This Just In: Study Shows That Boys are Stupider
A recent article published in the New York Times explored the correlation between being male and dying by falling into natural traps. This study was conducted by multiple universities around the world on woolly mammoths from Siberia and South Dakota. The study consisted of analyzing genes to determine gender. In order to make sure that the results were precise and accurate, the researchers analyzed the genes from bones, teeth and tusks. All results concluded that more than half of the woolly mammoths that died were male. All the woolly mammoths were found buried on what was described as "natural traps." Once males hit maturity between the ages of 14-16, they would leave their mothers and either wander off alone or find a newly made group consisting of young males that had just hit maturity. Scientists hypothesized that the large number of male mammoths that died was a result of the young males being inexperienced and finding themselves in dangerous situations without the help of their experienced mother. These studies did not analyze other parts of the mammoths' genomes, which could possibly be the study's largest downfall. By omitting the analysis of other genes, the researchers cannot be as certain as they can be that these deaths were solely based on the lack of experience in young males. This research is very important in arguments with men and boys because it allows women to cite their sources and have a scientific basis for their arguments. Men and boys, on the other hand, do not have scientific evidence for anything. Because their men and boys, and look where that got these woolly mammoths. Here is another article from a different news outlet that is reporting on the same research so you all know that I'm not lying about this.